Oops! Expelled again
by Smileyfaceofevil
Summary: Ever wondered more about how Percy got expelled from all those schools? This is about his fifth grade experience. OneShot.


Disclaimer:

**Disclaimer:**

**What? You thought I was Rick Riordan? No way, I couldn't write like that to save my life.**

**The idea of this is taken from Page 2 of The Lightning Thief. **

**Much thanks to my beta-reader.**

Expelled!

Dallas King was standing in front of me. Louisa Freedman in behind. I glanced down at the compulsory name tag on my jacket.

Louisa bumped into me.

"Move it, Jackson."

Slowly, I resumed my walk. We were being marched along a few hundred meters to the Saratoga battlefield for our annual fifth grade trip. For all the enthusiasm we showed it might have been the actual battle at Saratoga.

At the back of the line was Mr. Steeves, and at the front was Miss Lesley. Everyone knew the teachers were engaged, and that was why Miss Lesley was up from the first grade class room to help out. At the visitors centre we listened to the guide (Mr. Ralphbone) drone on about safety and regulations. Then he gestured for us to stand and began to say boring things about the 'Great British Army'. Most of us kids were practically sleepwalking, and almost ready to die an hour later as we came closer to the visitors centre, and back insight of the school bus.

"Now," Miss Lesley said happily. "After that fascinating talk I'm sure - Chelsea Pickings, are you listening? - Mr. Ralphbone will be delighted to show you all –listen please, children - Saratoga National Parks' very own Revolutionary War Cannon!"

An excited whoop came up from everyone, but especially us boys. Tommy Todson did a sort of dance at the idea of it, and all of us (about fifty kids) jumped up and yelled in excitement.

We fifth-graders dashed round in a state of excitement, following Mr. Ralphbone at a weird running pace. It was pandemonium. When the commotion finally ground to a halt, Mr. Ralphbone announced that a handful of us would get the privilege of standing up right by the cannon and using the equipment. Not to fire at anything of course, just to have a look.

The temporary silence was broken. Everyone chattered, screaming to be heard by no-one in particular.

"Silence!" Mr. Steeves roared. "Mr. Ralphbone, please select five children."

"Okay." Ralphbone said dully. "You, you, you and you." He announced; pointing at Dallas, Louisa and two Indian kids called Shreya and Sachin.

Miss Lesley smiled sympathetically at the remaining (disappointed) faces. "Mr. Ralphbone will choose one more child. _Won't you, Mr. Ralphbone?_"

"Er, oh. Oh, yes. Um…" He muttered, peering at our name tags. "And, joining the group will be er…Perseus Jackson."

Rewind… that was his mistake. He should have chose Brianna Lochness (who was next to me) or Peter Kin (next to me on the other side) or even Gregory Fitspatrick (behind me). Saying my name was a mistake. A big one. At the time though, I was ecstatic about him choosing me to examine the war cannon.

Shreya and Sachin had a look first; it took them about five minutes, by the end of which Miss Lesley was staring anxiously at her watch. Next, Dallas King and Louisa Freedman oohed and aahed over the cannon. Then Mr. Ralphbone gestured for me to come and have a look.

"What's that?" I remember saying. Pointing to a rusty lever of some kind.

"Don't touch it!" I heard Ralphbone yelp, a little too late. "Cannon's still loaded from the anniversary last month!"

The cannon shuddered.

A lot of people say smoking is bad for you. It saved our bus drivers life. Mr. Smith arrived early to pick us up, so he went and lit up by the visitors centre. So when I accidentally fired the cannon at the school bus, Nick Smith wasn't in it.

The next day the principal summoned me to her office and I was expelled from Camin Primary immediately. The only reason I wasn't expelled from Camin the day before was a power cut just before Mr. Steeves could call her up on the ancient visitors centre phone and arrange for another bus.

I had Mr. Steeves yell at me for the best part of an hour. I also had a bunch of kids congratulating me; except Lisa Crow, who complained indignantly that she would miss her ballet lesson, her recital and maybe even her jazz class; that her dinner might be ruined, and that then in order to eat it she would have to skip tap.

I told her she danced way too much.

She yelled at me until Kate and Donald Lestrang praised me for firing the cannon, and surviving 'that brute of a grumpy fusspot.' I assumed Kate meant Steeves, but Donald told me it was both Mr. Steeves and Lisa that Kate was talking about.

That was my Fifth Grade School. There were still eight weeks of school left over after I was expelled. I spent most of it with a home-school tutor.

It was torture. Then my Mom explained I was dyslexic with ADHD; and it was still torture. He automatically assumed I was slow and made me do my one times tables. At the end of the year he said he was pleased to announce I was "ready for two times tables already!"

So, review!


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